Current Thought

I'm beginning to feel bad for those who've claimed to love me...


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

her speech is therapy:

we hold ourselves more valuable than we're worth

do you ever get the feeling that you're worth absolutely zero,

the feeling of the unappreciated,

the feeling of being taken for granted,

that you'll never amount to someone's daydreams,

that have you have the same value as a stranger walking down the street...

the ocean and dry land division

befriend lonely beach
ocean sprays and sunny sides
tides smiles and goodbyes

We were once,and will be, strangers

a friendly smile
that could break down castle walls
which I once fell for

Pt: 1

My security

I'm envious of radar because they are no strangers to space exploration,
I'm envious of children because they know nothing to compare to the word devastation,
I'm envious of trees because they've lived so long with stories to tell,
I'm envious of Icarus because he won't know what it's like to have a son who fell,
I'm envious of currents that live a life traveled by sea,
I'm envious of people who've died on their feet, rather than live on their knees,
I'm jealous of Pluto, who's played a cameo in our solar system norm,
I'm jealous of college students who live their lives behind a social dorm,
I'm jealous of Noah's animals because they'll always have one another,
I'm jealous of grandparents because they'll spend most of their lives with their true lovers,
I'm jealous of the moon who always gets attention during the night,
I'm jealous of astronauts who partake in the miracle of flight,

Me Thinks

I could already feel it settling it..



my body and rest worked like clockwork due to my work schedule...



it would always start out like this...



my head would begin to feel heavy as it sank into my pillow slowly like a pebble to an ocean...









I would begin to feel the senses in my hands and legs let go and turn their heads towards a different direction...









my feet would begin to feel numb as the blood began to traffic slow allowing the thin air to tickle my toes...









as my body went on its temporary leave for the time being,



it never remembered to turn off my brain before closing the door.















while I laid in the absence of light, I could hear my bones mingling as my muscles I took shape to better position itself...









they made noises of fake plastic pearls rubbing against one another...









my eyes were too busy trying to make sense of the moving sand patterns it saw behind my eyelids...



it'd watch these dots dance and play and scatter with one another, entertaining my brain until it'd turn itself off.









I'd think of old memories,



old loves,



new loves,



the what ifs...















...and why nots?









"what if I just left without saying goodbye..."









I'd shift my head every now and then only to hear every strand of my hair rustle like dry leaves and grass on a windy day...









my nose would begin to take deeper breaths as my thoughts descended into a thick like darkness in the back rooms of my mind...